Tag Archives: My Mom

“In search of my mother’s garden, I found my own.” -Alice Walker Read

It’s hard to write today. I have been sick in bed all weekend. But I want all of my readers to know one thing, I am working on being GDPR compliant. I know that I may not reside in the EU but it still affects me so. Unfortunately, many of the things that I can use to help make my blog GDPR compliant cost money. But if you start seeing pop ups, that is why. I’m hoping WordPress will come out with new things, like you may have noticed at the bottom of your screen. Until then, I hope I am at least better than before.

momAnyway, Yesterday was Mother’s Day. So I wanted to do a little tribute to many of the women who changed my life.There are so many women who have had a hand in making me who I am. Many of them don’t even realize how much. Mother’s Day isn’t about celebrating the women who have birthed you, or even women who only have kids. No. It’s a woman’s holiday, to show your appreciation for all that the women in your life have done for you. If it was only a day for people who physically birthed you, many people would never celebrated it.

grandmaI have been blessed with many wonderful women in my life who have been there for me, no matter what. There are too many to make a list but I will try to include photos of everyone.

As many of you know, I had a rough start in life and at the age of 7 I went from living with my mom to living with my grandparents. I spent some time at aunts and uncles homes but mostly with my janellegrandparents until I was 17, when they passed. I went back with aunts and uncles. I have been in and out of homes, my life has change a million times, but no matter what, I am cared for and loved. From family, to friends. From beds and couches in various cities and states. I know that no matter what, I will always have somewhere to go and I am grateful to know that.

I can never thank these women enough but I hope they know how much I love and appreciate them. Below I have a slide show of many of the women who changed my life as several videos to for you as well.

As always, thank you for visiting my blog. I hope you continue to come back each week. Comment below with how you show the women in your life that you appreciate them.

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“When you forgive, you in no way change the past – but you sure do change the future.” -Bernard Meltzer

25319884_1756491134659277_1436553091_oToday I want to talk about a specific point in my 30 Before 30 list; forgiving those who have hurt me. Why do I want to talk about that specific point? Well, last week I went to my college to meet with a counselor to get my Student Education Plan done, which was a great meeting by the way. Anyway, I saw someone there that I always hoped to never see again. And it was at that moment that I realised that number 12 will be one of the most difficult things to accomplish.

No, I am not one to hold a grudge but this person in particular hurt me in a way no one else in the world ever could. How could I forgive this person? I mean, I was able to forgive the one person who hurt me more than anyone else in the world, my mom. Why couldn’t I forgive this person?

Who is the person I am speaking of? Well, his name isn’t important but he was a guy I dated a long time ago. He wasn’t my first love or even my first boyfriend but he lied and stole almost $600 from me then lied some more. He hurt me mentally and emotionally. He took something I could never get back. How could I forgive him for that? How could you forgive such a manipulative human being?

It’s been seven years and every single time I hear his name or see him, the same anger bubbles up from the depths of my soul. How do I let this go? Well, thankfully we live in the day and age of the internet so I looked up a few things to help me out.

I started reading a wikihow article (found here). The first part in forgiving someone is deciding to forgive, which I have. Under the first step it says the following, “Forgiveness does not mean excusing or accepting the betrayal. Rather, forgiveness is the act of freeing yourself of the anguish and anger that you’ve felt towards the person who betrayed you. Forgiveness means letting go of your grudge against the other person.” We’ve all heard that holding grudges just hurt us and it’s so true, we feel so much better when we free ourselves of those feelings.

Under part two, step one it says the following, “If you’re sad, ashamed, or angry about being betrayed, that is perfectly natural. Try to find positive ways to deal with these feelings. Accepting how you feel is an important step toward emotional recovery, which is the first step toward forgiveness.” All too often we don’t want to acknowledge the negative feelings we have toward a particular human being but we need to. I know that I have negative feelings toward him.

I really like what it says under step 10, “While the betrayal you experienced may seem senseless and random at the time, step back and try to give the experience value. Instead of thinking of it as a completely terrible event without any beneficial aspects, you could think of ways in which you might actually be thankful for it. The meaning you take from the misery of betrayal can bolster your emotional strength, which you can then use to forgive the person who betrayed you.” If that incident had never happened, I wouldn’t have some of the experiences I’ve had. I also wouldn’t have the knowledge.

It may seem weird but researching it helped me understand why this point is on my 30 Before 30 list. Yes, I put it there. But I didn’t know how beneficial it would be to me. But after reading the articles I found, which I will add links to them below, I feel better about it. I can forgive. There is nothing I shouldn’t be able to forgive.

As always, thank you for visiting my blog and I hope that if you are struggling to forgive someone that this has helped you. Read the articles and decide now that you want to set yourself free. And if all else fails and you need a laugh, watch the music video below!

Forgiveness After Betrayal

The Art of Forgiveness: 10 Steps to Handling Betrayal With Elegance and Grace

The Power of Forgiveness

When You Have Been Betrayed

How to forgive when you’re still mad