Tag Archives: Missouri

“If it is to be, it is up to me.” -Anonymous

me.jpgHello readers! I hope you all had a fantastic weekend, I know I did. My spring break has ended and it’s back to school for me, and many others. Today I want to touch on a topic that I have been hesitant to bring up. Let me go refer you back to my 30 before 30 list (I do that a lot lately, I know).

As I mentioned, number 19 probably threw people for a loop. I’m a returned missionary, why should I need to “find God again?” Well, today I have decided to open my heart to you all. In turn, I hope you can open your hearts and minds, as well.

In 2014 I came home from my mission and went home to a new ward. A ward that I only went to I think twice? I didn’t feel at home. And then I moved in with Hector (see my Author intro for info on him) after Thanksgiving because I couldn’t stand being where I was any longer. I went to church maybe once or twice before we got married in May. I went from being Christ centered 24/7 to nothing just like that. I was part of the 50% of RMs that go inactive. I got a stern talking to before I left my mission from one of my ward mission leaders, “You better not become part of the 50% Sister Miller.” I thought about his words a lot at the beginning but they rang in my ears less and less over time.

mormonAfter Hector and I got married, we went to church a few times and then didn’t go anymore. Then the sisters started coming over and meeting with us, it was wonderful. I missed it, I truly did. And then sisters did a drop lesson because he wasn’t willing to progress. So we went to church less, once again. Then we moved to Studio City and I think we went a total of 5 times in the 2 years we were there.

Well, then I went to Missouri for a month and avoided going to church. I wanted to, I just didn’t feel right. Stupid, I know. I returned to L.A. for a month but didn’t attend church or anything. Then I had a traumatic experience occur and moved in with my best friend. I thought about going to church but felt so broken. I didn’t want to reach out to any one. I felt like a failure, though I know that’s not true.

Well, going to Time Out For Women changed something. I finally went to church a few weeks ago. It was like going home after being gone for so long. Everyone in my ward here is so loving. They are so understanding about my divorce, they all want to talk to me. I even had dinner at the bishop’s house tonight.

I am not perfect, I never claimed to be. I’m still learning and growing, as everyone should be. And I am going to church again. I’m done being broken and feeling alone. I finally found home after my mission, it just took me a long time. God doesn’t give us more than we can handle, and I need to remember that.

Also, I have City of Enoch to thank for keeping me going. I have been constantly listening to their album on Spotify and they lift me up when I’m down. I am proud to say that I am Mormon. It is part of me, it’s who I am. I am a daughter of a Heavenly Father and I needed to remember that.

I found an article from 2013 that I think everyone should read, it is a great read about how some returned missionaries go inactive. View it here. And listen to the songs below…actually, just listen to City of Enoch’s entire album, it’s great!

As always, thank you for visiting my blog. Please know that I am truly pouring my soul out in my blog posts, especially ones like this one. I am also here to listen to anything you all have to say. If you have anything you’d like to bring up, please comment below. I love hearing from you!

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“Some people get an education without going to college. The rest get it after they get out.” ―Mark Twain

Many people now-a-days have attended, are attending, or will be attending college. I didn’t always know that I would go to college nor did I ever know what college I would be going to. It wasn’t until high school that I really thought about college. You’re entire high school career, people talk about all of these colleges and all these different majors that you can choose from. I remember in 8th grade we actually had a representative from FIDM come and talk to my class. I was really interested in FIDM for a short couple of hours but realized it was a dead dream pretty quickly. Starting in 9th grade, I developed a love for BYU Idaho. Yes, BYU is such a “typical Mormon” school and maybe that’s what was pulling me towards it. I had no idea what I wanted to do in college, though.

Screen Shot 2017-01-24 at 3.06.30 PM.pngIn 10th grade, I moved to Missouri and decided that I wanted to be a OB/GYN and go to Missou or maybe to the small college in West Plains. Really it was whatever my soon-to-be scholarship would pay for. Sadly, after the death of my grandparents, I had to move back to California for 11th and 12th grade. By Senior year, I had it in my head that I wasn’t good enough to go to a university. I wasn’t a straight A student, I didn’t have a lot of extracurricular activities under my belt, and I didn’t have the means to afford the tuition. I finally settled with the community college and picked English as my major because it was my favorite subject. I never took the SAT or ACT because I felt that I would do too poorly on it anyways, nor was it needed to get into a community college. I got in, not that FCC declines many people (if any). I took classes and found what I really wanted to major in: Child Development. It wasn’t until my 3rd semester that I knew exactly what I wanted to do with my degree when I got it. My goal was to one day own my own daycare and maybe teach Child Development in college when I’m older.

screen-shot-2017-01-24-at-3-05-03-pmWhy do I tell you this? Because college is hard. From dealing with parents’ thoughts about college and your major, to picking your field, to paying for college and choosing where you will live. Some parents force a specific college down their child’s throat from their birth and they don’t really have a say in where they go to school or even what they want to do career wise. Others have family that tells them that college is a waste and that nobody really goes to college, that it’s all a scam. Then there are other families that tell you that your passion is pointless to pursue because you won’t make any money and that you should become a nurse.

screen-shot-2017-01-24-at-3-03-41-pmI cannot tell you too much about how living in a dorm is but I have had experiences living in a two bedroom apartment with a complete stranger. It was kind of like living in a dorm and I really got along with my roommate. We shared food and makeup and we went places. in my car. I even went to her graduation and helped her move out into her new apartment. I might even do a post on my experience in that living situation sometime.

Anyway, I want you all to know ten things that I was not told while growing up.

  1. You are good enough to apply for a university
  2. It’s ok to go to a city college and transfer to a university
  3. You don’t have to pick your major during your first year of college
  4. Focus on doing your general education that first year
  5. Your passion absolutely can become your career, it’s not about the money it’s about loving what you do every day
  6. There are many ways to pay for college, it can be affordable
  7. It’s ok to apply at a bunch of schools
  8. Start thinking about college earlier
  9. You can still stay friends with your high school buddies but graduation will change how your relationships are. I’ve lost some friends and gotten closer to others.
  10. Just be yourself. Don’t change who you are just because you feel like you need to be something different in college.

I also want to include 10 resources that you may find helpful. I have used some of them.

  1. Go here to apply for FAFSA
  2. The 10 best sites to look for scholarships
  3. List of colleges in the US (this is not every college in the US)
  4. Resources for College Students
  5. Getting Textbooks from Chegg (I’ve used this one often)
  6. 31 Things You Need To Know About College
  7. You’ll get lost so you’ll need a map
  8. 50 Things Every College Student Should Experience At Least Once
  9. How to Deal with Homesickness Freshman Year
  10. Ten Common Problems Students Face in College

I hope my tips and resources help you or someone you know that is in college. If you have anything you would like to add, please comment below.

As always, thank you for reading. Click follow to read more from me!