Category Archives: Inside my Mind

“You must be Caroline. You look just like the girls Max used to give wedgies to in the cafeteria” -Mr. Huck

This week I had to opportunity to partake in very exciting activities. What were those activities? Well, I was able to go meet Ian Harding and Lucy Hale on Tuesday evening for Ian Harding’s book signing and photo-op. He recently released his first book, “Odd Birds” and is on a book tour right now. I was then able to meet Beth Behrs last night at her Q&A/talk/book signing for her newly released book “The Total ME-Tox.”

First off, I will talk about how I found out about these events and how you, too, can find something near you. Living in the L.A. area for about a year and I had absolutely no idea these things happened. I would have been there for so many other people had I known. I was actually on Facebook last week just looking at events happening in the area when I saw it, “Ian Harding celebrates Odd Birds with Photo Op & pre-signed book.” Of course, seeing Ian Harding’s name got me excited all at once so I clicked. And that introduced me to other goings on in the area.

So how do you go to one of these events? You get yourself down to the Barnes & Noble store before it opens, stand in line to buy the book (the day of) in order to get your wristband, then go home and do what you need to do until it’s time to get back. They don’t start lining up until about 6:00pm so there’s no use in staying the entire day. Plus, whatever band you have is where you will be at in line. Because I have plans to see more people, I became a B&N member so I get to be up at the front of the line. A membership is $25 per year and gets you great perks.

ian          So what was it like meeting Ian and Lucy? Well, very short to tell you the truth. It was a pre-signed book so there is no personalization. BUT, getting a picture with the two of them was wonderful. I told them my name and we got a few pictures and hugs. They are very nice people. There was even a girl who traveled from Mexico to see them.

beth          What was it like meeting Beth Behrs? It was definitely different from the night before. First of all, the crowd was much smaller so that was a plus. It was also a Q&A rather than just a photo-op. She talked to us, which you can see in the video below. She is a very funny and wonderful person. My photo with her was also just as wonderful. I am very thankful I got to meet such an inspiring woman. I have also had the opportunity to see her perform on 2 Broke Girls (tvticket.com has free tickets to tv shows like her’s).

Will I do this again? YES! We actually have plans for a few other ones soon so keep an eye out for that. If you’ve ever been to one, please comment below with your thoughts. And if you were at either one of these, let me know. As always, thank you for reading! I hope you have a great day.

“Have no fear These are nowhere near The best years of your life” -Brad Paisley

Dear 16-year-old Carra,

16          Your life will change in the next year and I know it will be hard. Just remember that there are people who love you and are here for you. You will be able to grow and learn so much because you will be getting out of your comfort zone. You’ll lose people you love, you’ll move twice in one year, and you’ll grow closer to Heavenly Father.
When given the opportunity to go see Mountain Grove High School, you’ll do it, you’ll meet the counselor and come out of the meeting ready to move. Actually ask questions this time, don’t be afraid. It’ll be exciting but sad. Leaving your friends will be hard, it is worth it.
See your mom before you move. It’ll eat at you if you don’t. She wanted to say 16 3goodbye but you left before she could. Also, spend more time packing and less time playing. You’ll have a week to pack all of your stuff. Make sure you put Whoonu in a safe spot so you don’t lose it because if you don’t you’ll find out it’s $60 when you’re looking into buying it again.
There will be many boys interested in you, say no to all of them. I mean it, all of them. Don’t even text Casey after Christmas, you’ll thank me later. Boys are no good and you deserve better than all of them. Having Dakota as a friend is enough, he’s a nice guy. But seriously, do not date any of them.
16 1          Don’t give your friend Megan money because you’ll never get it back. Also, don’t spend your first week not eating and hiding in the bathroom at lunchtime. Make friends.You will become really good friends with the girl who you have almost every class with, her name is Shelby. She’ll introduce you to people and you’ll become “popular” because everyone in your grade knows you.
When your English class gets into a discussion about Mormons, don’t be afraid to turn it into a teaching moment. Straightening out the lies will help them in the long run. Tell Derek that chocolate doesn’t destroy your soul, tell Rachel that we are Christian, stun everyone because they had no idea there was a Mormon in the class. You can do it, don’t be shy.
Another thing to consider is your career project in Personal Finance. You’re 16 2thinking about doing it on OB GYN. Don’t. That’s not really what you want to be, you want to be a teacher or a writer. Don’t pick OB GYN just because it makes more money and it goes with what your classmates are doing. Be yourself Carra, it’s ok.
Finally, don’t yell at your grandparents. You’re going to miss them one day and all of those times you screamed and fought will flood your mind for a time. Try to see it from their point of view. Also, learn all you can from grandma, make it a point to cook with her. Ask her about her life. If you don’t, you’ll regret it later in life.
You are a very smart, beautiful, and caring young woman. Don’t let anyone change that or tell you different. Stay close to your family, spend time with them. Garden with grandma, play pool with grandpa. You’ll miss out on all of that if you don’t. They love you and I love you. Stay strong.

Sincerely,
25-year-old Carra

“Oh, so you GOOGLED him Oh, well, that changes everything then, doesn’t it? What could I possibly worry about now that I know you’ve conducted such a thorough Internet search?” ―Alyson Noel, Fated

Screen Shot 2017-04-25 at 3.05.27 PM          Google is a crazy invention. You can get answers to so many difficult questions, find perfect images to show exactly what a certain creature looks like, and shop for all of your needs. One thing I believe everyone has done at least once is Google themselves. Come on, I know you’ve done it. No need to be embarrassed.

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I decided to Google myself and see what would come up. It was actually really interesting. I looked myself up with my maiden name as well as my married name. I want to share with you my results. At the top of this page is the image results for my maiden name while the second one is with my married name. Below I have included images of the first pages with both names.

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Why did I share this with you? Because I really wanted to see what would come up when I Google myself. It was an interesting find! And as you can tell, there are a lot of images that really are me as well as a few from Redheaded Owl. I want to see what your results are so post them below! Share what the craziest thing you found on your name was. And I know that everyone won’t have as much fun as I did nor as positive of an experience as I had but I think it’s still a good idea.

As always, thank you for visiting. Don’t forget to follow my blog for more from me! I hope to hear from you in the comments. Have a great day.

“Mexico is a mosaic of different realities and beauties.” -Enrique Pena Nieto

17836970_1660350574273334_712357375_o          I first want to say I apologize for not posting on Tuesday. I got home later than planned. This post will actually be the one that should have been posted on Tuesday, so nothing will be missed.

On Saturday morning I left with my husband and my in-laws to go to Mexico. Not the Mexico that tourists flock to but the Mexico where my husband’s family resides. His grandma and many of his aunts, uncles, and cousins all still live in Mexico so his parents visit at least once a year. This is my second time visiting them so they all knew who I was. The first time I went was a couple of months before we got married so we were able to take them invitations.17837709_1660350420940016_1661096531_o

This time wasn’t much different from the last. We visited family, I understood very little because they all speak spanish (though a couple of them do speak English), we ate a ton of wonderful food, and walked around looking at all of the shops. We bought candy, Hector bought some shoes, I found a pair of boots that I love but they didn’t have my size, and we had so much food. So much so that I gained a few pounds that I now have to add that to my goal that I already had.

17820387_1660350500940008_176045479_o          One thing different from last time is the amount of spanish I learned. Last time I was too shy to actually ask about any spanish words but this time I was very into learning. I hope that I will one day be able to actually speak with Hector’s family but for now, I am a beginner. I will be the first to say that some of the words I learned won’t help me much but it was still fun to learn. I think the thing I loved the most was learning how to say baby animals. Hector’s grandma had little chicks in her backyard (pollitos) as well as one of her cats had 3 little kittens (gatitos).17820043_1660350464273345_735349511_o So, of course I learned how to say what they were. I also learned to say a couple of food things so that I could order for myself sometimes. For example, I was able to tell the person that I wanted a Strawberry Fanta at one of the places we went to eat tortas. If you have never had tortas, I highly recommend them because they are great.

 

As I mentioned previously, we ate A LOT. We probably ate too much, to be honest. But we don’t get good Mexican food here in the states very often so we took what we could get. A few things that we ate includes the following:

  • Tortas17837708_1660350517606673_878834059_o
  • Tacos
  • Mariscos
  • Churros
  • Mangoneadas
  • More tortas
  • More tacos
  • A stew with cactus in it (I have no idea what it was called, Hector’s grandma made it)

I absolutely loved the food and can’t wait to have it again. The picture to the right is actually one way that they made taco meat. I have to say that the place we ate this at makes the best tacos ever. Absolutely delicious. We hope to go again in October, when his parents are going to help Hector’s grandma fix up her house, but there is no guarantee. If not, at least I have pictures to drool over this time.

Anyway, as always please comment below. I’d like to hear your experiences in Mexico. If you’d like to see more of my content, please subscribe.

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“Don’t stop when you are tired, stop when you are done.” -Unknown

17499696_10209138932970650_586903153_oHello readers! Today I want to report on what it was like for my husband and I to run in the Bubble Run 5K this17521607_10209138935770720_1927390249_o year. Or shall I say walk? We walked pretty much the entire thing and still finished in less than an hour.

If you don’t know, a 5k is about 3.1 miles. A bubble run 5K is 3.1 miles and every so often you run through a fountain of bubbles, all colored differently.

We attended the Bubble Run 5K in Anaheim, California and it was the best experience ever. There was a great turn out, including many children and babies. The price was only $20 plus a $6 service fee and you get your participant number with safety pins, a sweat headband, a temporary tattoo, 17548751_10209138935610716_53652363_o.jpgand a t-shirt. There are also more things that you can spend extra money on, like socks, tutus, sunglasses, towels, rubber duckies, and more t-shirts but we didn’t do that.

The location of the Bubble Run was the Angel Stadium. It was great because part of the course was on the field and another part was up in the bleachers area.

We do have some videos but unfortunately I am unable to upload any at this time. When I am able to, I hope to come back and add a few. But until then, I will include a slideshow of our photos of this wonderful adventure. I know this will not be the only 5K I ever do and if you are on the fence about doing a 5K, I say do it. It’s fun and you really don’t have to run at all!

As always, thank you for visiting my blog. Your comments are always welcome. Let me know if you were there and maybe even share some pictures! If you want more content from me, subscribe via email to get updated right away.

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“People often say that motivation doesn’t last. Well, neither does bathing – that’s why we recommend it daily.” -Zig Ziglar

After much consideration, I decided to make a 26 before 26 list. With help from my friend Jewel and my husband, I put together a list of 26 things I want to get done in the next year. If you read my post about 25 before 25 post, then you saw that I 16930552_10208900352046276_313945688_owas unable to complete it and you might be wondering why I would do another one. Well, one thing is for sure; I am definitely giving myself more than just a couple months this time so there is a better chance of me completing all 26 items. I’m determined to do it this time! I even added pictures to represent them to my vision board, to learn more about that, click here. Here is my 26 before 26 list:

  1. Finish a 5K
  2. Run a 5K (because it’s different than just finishing one)
  3. Finish Harry Potter 1-7 (I’m still on book 5)
  4. Finish the first draft of my Work in Progress
  5. Host a themed dinner party
  6. Throw myself a fabulous birthday party
  7. Get my food handlers card
  8. Go whale watching
  9. Blog at least weekly
  10. Read 26 books
  11. Make friends in L.A.
  12. Go on a girls-only trip
  13. Take a cooking class
  14. Start a YouTube channel with Jewel
  15. Get a job I enjoy
  16. Go white water rafting
  17. Make a music video
  18. Lose 20 pounds
  19. Learn to do winged eyeliner
  20. Get a calling in the church
  21. Visit 3 temples I’ve never been to (Los Angeles, Newport Beach, and San Diego are my goals)
  22. Buy and decorate a house
  23. Reach level 10 life
  24. Do something that scares me
  25. Be positive for a week
  26. Reach 200 members in Bullet Journaling California

 

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I am very optimistic about this list and I know that I can do it. And to help you know that you can do it too, go watch this video on YouTube from the Steve Harvey Show. Please share with us what you are hoping to accomplish before your next birthday. As always, thank you for reading. If you want to enjoy more content from me, follow my blog.

“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” -Marcus Aurelius

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What is privilege? According to Merriam Webster the definition of privilege is “a right or immunity granted as a peculiar benefit, advantage, or favor :  prerogative; especially :  such a right or immunity attached specifically to a position or an office.” The definition used for kids is “a right or liberty granted as a favor or benefit especially to some and not others.” Are we privileged? What makes a person privileged? I know that I am privileged, though when I took a Buzzfeed quiz it states that I am not. It also said that my husband is most privileged, which is interesting. I found the quiz the other day while I was sucked into watching Buzzfeed videos, which most of us know that’s easy to do. I stumbled across the video “How Privileged Are You?” The video takes 8 people from different walks of life and they all take this quiz of 100 questions together. For the quiz, you check which statements apply to your life. There are 100 statements about race, religion, education, wealth, and so much more.
I read a few comments on the video asking why there were no questions about abuse or the like. Abuse isn’t about whether you are privileged or not. Privilege is not like that at all. There are, however, privileges connected with being a certain gender, religion, race, or status. It is not a rule, however, that the middle age white man is more privileged than that of a middle age Native American woman. Like my husband and I, I am Caucasian and he is Mexican. Right off the bat people would say that I am more privileged than he is purely because of my skin color. This is not the case, though. You can see my husband’s results above and my results below. He scored 76 out of 100 whereas I scored 45 out of 100.
I know that, though this says I am not privileged, I most certainly am. The only reason I scored so low is because of my childhood. I was homeless, I skipped meals, I was teased and bullied. I was actually even bullied for being white. You don’t hear of that often but it happened. I was bullied all growing up, even into college. I know am I privileged now, though. I had a house, I am married to an amazing person and we can get by without me working. Some families do not of the privilege of surviving on one income. I have a car, I never have to worry about going hungry, I have clean clothes to wear. Yes, I hear ridicule about the religion I have chosen to be apart of but there are other religions who are suffering more.
Times aren’t like they were in the 1800’s, Mormons aren’t being murdered for no reason anymore. Other people are, such as Muslims. It breaks my heart to go on Facebook and see videos of a woman who was assaulted due to what she was wearing or men who talk about how others were shouting at them to “go back to their country” and calling them terrorists. What a world we live in.
I don’t think I have ever gotten really political on a post in the 4 years I have had this blog running but my heart goes out to those who are suffering. There are many who have lost so much and people look down on them, even though the losses were out of their control.
Please take the time out of your busy day to take the quiz How Privileged Are You? Check(list) your privilege. You won’t regret it. Also, remember that whether you score high or low, there is nothing to be ashamed of. Don’t be ashamed that you went to an Ivy League school but your best friend could barely afford a city college. Don’t be ashamed that your mom fed you hamburgers out of the dumpster while your classmates ate at Olive Garden. Where you went to school or what you ate as a kid doesn’t define you, your actions and words do. Just be a good human being, privilege or not.

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“Ones best success comes after their greatest disappointments.” -Henry Ward Beecher

I talked about the difficulty of getting a job in today’s world a few posts ago. My stance has not changed and I am still frustrated that people won’t give me a chance but I have a new look at it. I have been turned down by 11 jobs in the last month and it was rejectiondisheartening but I have had a realization: the rejection now is preparing me for the rejection I will, inevitably, get from publishers. Just think about how many times J.K. Rowling was turned down; the number is 9 or 12 depending on where you get your information. Kevin Anderson & Associates gives us a list of  Ten Famous Books Rejected By Publishers. I know that I, too, will have my share of rejection when I am ready to get published but I won’t give up, just like J.K. Rowling.

I know this is short but I want all of my readers to know that I believe in you. I don’t know you but I know that you can do it. Just today I jogged/walked 2 miles in 37 minutes. I never thought I coulddo-it do that. In high school I made it a point to walk as slow as I could while doing the mile run. Heck, Redheaded Owl and I took the entire class period to walk the mile in 7th grade. I promise you that you CAN do anything you put your mind to. It won’t be easy but is anything really easy? It will, however, be worth it in the end. And when you look back at ow hard you pushed and how far you came, you will be proud.

As always, thank you for reading. Please comment below with what you are pushing yourself with. What about when rejection had you down but you pushed right back up? I look forward to hearing from you!

“How old would you be if you didn’t know how old you are?” -Satchel Paige

groundhog          Hello dear readers. First of all, happy Groundhog day. If you didn’t hear the outcome, check out this link. I’m not here to post about that though so don’t get your hopes too high.

Today I am actually talking about my 25 before 25 list that I made towards the end of last year. I gave myself about 2 or so months to complete this list and I was very eager to do so. I got the idea from other bullet journalists in the Facebook groups I’m in (Boho Berry TribeArtsy Bullet Journal JunkiesBullet Journal SocietyBullet Journal NewbiesBullet Journal BeginnersBuJo SpreadsLDS Bullet Journal, and Minimalist Bullet Journals). I then posted my pages in my bullet journal group, Bullet Journaling California and got a lot of positive feedback and I even inspire others to do it too. Here is a picture of my list:

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If you are unable to read what my list says, here it is:

  1. Finish reading Harry Potter 1-7
  2. Re-read the Book of Mormon
  3. Learn to bake bread rolls Checked box symbol
  4. Write letters often
  5. Take more pictures Checked box symbol
  6. Leave inspiring notes in random places
  7. Try something new with my hair Checked box symbol
  8. Try  new makeup styles Checked box symbol
  9. Learn a new skill
  10. Get rid of stuff I don’t need Checked box symbol
  11. Make a budget and stick to it
  12. Go to bed earlier for a week Checked box symbol
  13. Do something I’d never do Checked box symbol
  14. Visit a random town in California Checked box symbol
  15. Watch an older movie (Breakfast at Tiffany’s) Checked box symbol
  16. Find a form of exercise I enjoy Checked box symbol
  17. Find a style that works for me and continue to add to it Checked box symbol
  18. Buy and wear heels Checked box symbol
  19. Send a letter to my old house Checked box symbol
  20. Start a better relationship with my parents Checked box symbol
  21. Do something special for someone
  22. Start a savings plan for the year
  23. Do something for my in-laws Checked box symbol
  24. Be positive for a week
  25. Learn to love myself

Am I disappointed in myself that I didn’t complete all 25, sure. But I know that I can do better when I give myself more time. Which is why I am going to make a 30 before 30 list. It gives me 5 years to do complete a list of awesome stuff! I want to add some stuff from my bucket list on this one though, because I have more time. If you have any suggestions, please feel free to drop a comment below.

Have you ever tried something like this? How did it turn out? Do you have any pictures to share?

As always, thank you for reading and have a great day!

“There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.” ―Maya Angelou

Hello readers! Today will be a little different. I am in a fiction writing class this semester and one of our assignments is to write a short 5-page scene. I want to share with you what I have so far. I want to know what my readers think about what it is. What grade would you give me? What advice do you have to offer to make my story better? Just as a note, my teacher wanted us to base our story off of real life people. Also, he said that there doesn’t need to be a beginning, middle, and end so don’t fret about that, either. I look forward to reading your comments below.

Accidents Happen

             I still remember the day that I found out that my best friend and her daughter were hit by a car. I remember it like it was yesterday. The memories haunt me every day; I always think about how one small thing could have changed everything, either for the good or for the bad. The memories always start off ok, always starting with the moments before I even knew what had happened.

“Community College has so many class options but not enough online, I just need a few more classes and I could graduate in a year. Too bad a lot of the ones I have left are either hybrid or face-to-face classes, huh?” I said to my brindle colored pug, Ramsey, as I was looking at what classes I wanted to, or at least could, take in the spring. He had just jumped up in my lap and settled there all comfortable and ready for a nap.

I had just moved 4 hours away from the college I was attending and I was taking as many online courses as I could before I had to transfer, in the summer, to the local college by my new home in the big city. “Maybe I’ll call Misha and she can give me some guidance, since she has a degree. Or she could at least listen to me go on and on about how annoying it is that I can’t take in-person courses and finish my degree on time.” Ramsey barked as if to say that my idea was a great one. Honestly, when is it every a bad idea to talk to your best friend about your life decisions?

I settled down on my fluffy couch, wrapped in my fresh out of the dryer blanket, with my computer, open to the list of web only course options on Web advisor, in front of me then picked up my phone to dial Misha’s number. My registration date was fast approaching and I needed to figure this all out fast. The phone rang several times, then, right before the last ring, a soft voice could be heard on the other line. I was so glad to have someone to talk to, other than Ramsey. Don’t get me wrong, he was a great listener, but sometimes it’s nice to talk to someone who can respond back with words instead of just kisses and barks.

“Hey best friend!” I was super excited to talk about school, especially since it was what we were talking about the day before. “This is Lidia, Misha’s mom, she and Colleen were hit by a car this morning while they were walking to daycare.” The phone slipped out of my hand with a crash, onto the floor. I was trembling and tears began to stream down my pale face.. Ramsey began barking wildly, as he knew something was wrong, and began nudging my messy blond hair from the couch. It took me all but several seconds to realize Misha’s mom was calmly calling for me through the phone, I heard my name being said several times before it actually registered in my brain. Finally I came-to and picked the phone back up off the ground. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” I was at a loss for words. Was my best friend of eleven years gone? And her little one-year-old daughter; was she gone as well? I needed answers; I needed to be there. Why was I still sitting on the couch in my little 500 square foot apartment, almost four hours away? I had a car; I had the ability to travel from my apartment to the hospital where she was, hopefully still alive. I hadn’t ever done it before because my husband was always the one driving but I needed to be there to see Misha for myself. I had to know that she was still here, I couldn’t lose her. Not this way. I couldn’t lose another loved one. I especially couldn’t lose another loved one due to reckless drivers. Would God take away everyone I cared about in the same way? How could this have happened, again?

My thoughts were almost drowning out what Misha’s mom was saying to me over the phone. My thoughts had slowed down enough to understand when Lidia had said “Misha is ok, she’s awake. She has multiple broken bones and swelling but she’ll be alright. She’s the one who told me to answer your call. She must have a specific ringtone for you because she knew it was you calling right away.” There was a small sigh of relief amidst all of my sniffling and tears. She also informed me of Colleen’s condition “Colleen is fine, there are no broken bones and she should, hopefully, be discharged later in the day.” The more words I caught, the less frantic I was feeling. By the end of our conversation, which was rather short, my tears weren’t flowing as heavily but I still wasn’t able to settle down.

I paced the studio apartment several times before deciding to log onto Facebook and write something about how I was feeling. I didn’t think Misha wanted everyone to know just yet, or ever, so I simply made a vague post stating that a close friend and her daughter were hit by a car and that they needed prayers and thoughts of healing. Not too obvious but anyone who knew Misha would know it was her, I was sure of it. Not too long after hitting the “post” button did two other friends, Mary and Melody, know exactly who it was and Melody quickly sent me the official article that was posted, hours ago, about the accident. I hadn’t even thought to see if there was already anything in the news. I pushed my glasses up the bridge of my nose and began reading. According to the news report, both Misha and Colleen were in critical care and fighting for their lives. Even though I knew this to be false, and that they were both ok, it had me freaking out all over again. I read on, though, wanting more information. I found a couple of other articles on Facebook along with a few photos. They all stated different excuses for why the driver hit Misha. “I bet he was texting and made a whole slew of excuses as to not get in trouble.” I said, angrily, to Ramsey. I kept reading the article over and over, thinking I had missed something. “The driver was a nineteen year old girl who had friends in the car. The driver didn’t see the woman crossing in the cross walk but the passengers all saw her and tried to warn the driver when it was too late. The driver didn’t even stop until her windshield was broken from the impact of the child’s body.” I kept imagining little Colleen’s body, smashing into the window then rolling to the ground. I didn’t want to read any more of what was said but I couldn’t help it. It was drawing me to it. And seeing those pictures. One of them was actually of Misha lying in the road, bloody and broken, underneath the car. Another photo showed the medical personal putting Colleen in the ambulance.

I then began reading the comments. “She deserved to be hit, she’s a horrible mother.” “She obviously didn’t love her child if she put her in that much danger.” “She doesn’t deserve to be a mother.” I was furious with every comment I read. My face was getting hot, I felt the world getting darker and the sounds of the big city were growing farther away. They had no idea what the situation was or what kind of mother she was. How could they be so harsh without having all of the facts or without knowing what kind of person she truly is? No one deserves what happened to Misha, I wouldn’t wish it on anyone, not even my worst enemy. She was the best mom I knew, she was my best friend. I kept thinking, “I can’t lose her, I just can’t lose my best friend. I still need her in my life. She doesn’t deserve to die. She needs to be here for her daughter.”

I finally realized I was blacking out, as I was standing for a long time with my knees locked and hadn’t had a lot to drink. I quickly headed for the bed, where I had a collage of photos, several with Misha in them. I zoned out while staring at them, replaying the memories in my head. “What if memories are all I have left?” I stared at the pictures of us so happy. There we were on the school bus, her red hair was flowing because all of the windows were down. Another one of us, my favorite, was taken outside the theater while we were in line waiting for the premier of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows Part 2. We had just graduated a couple months before that, and Misha still had short hair from when she donated it all to Locks of Love. I still had braces and my hair was dark from when I decided to dye it brown. The most recent picture was taken when Misha spent a week with us over the summer. We did so much in that week; we took the metro for the first time, I got my first real sunburn from our time at the beach, we went to an AMC movie theater where they have reclining chairs instead of the uncomfortable ones we usually sat in. The picture was from our time on the Metro, Misha was making an “Oh my gosh, we’re going to get lost on this thing!” kind of face and I was just reading the maps to figure out where we were and where we needed to be. I didn’t want to scare her but we really could be lost already and we had only left ten minutes ago.

I was deep in thought when the sound of the door shutting made me jump. My husband, Philip, was home and he sat next to me as I burst into tears again, explaining exactly what had happened and how I was feeling. He just held me as I sobbed in his arms. My best friend was, according to the articles, near death and I wasn’t there. She could be dead by now. I would hope that someone would have contacted me but I knew that there would be so many other things to worry about. “Tara, how about we take a walk. Maybe get some fresh air. I think getting out of the house would do some good for your mind.”

I agreed on taking a walk so I slowly got up and got dressed. I felt so depressed and like a horrible friend for not rushing to Misha’s side. However, driving that far alone for the first time and in this weather in my state of mind would not have been the best idea. Melody was the one who pointed out how stupid it would be. “We don’t need another person in the hospital.” She was right, I needed to wait. Philip and I would just drive up there after he got off of work on Friday afternoon and head that way. I needed patience. All I could do was pray that she and Colleen would heal and that they would be ok in the end. I knew it would be, Misha was a strong woman, as was Colleen. They had wonderful people to be there for them and the support of many more.

As always, thank you for coming to my blog. I hope you have a great day!

EDIT (Feb 8, 2017): I am posting my classmates’ comments below.